Here is a little exercise for you.

Stand in front of a full length mirror and describe what you see.   

I am willing to bet my mortgage that the majority of you start with the stuff that you don’t like

I am with the majority here I don’t like that I am a hulking wide load in the ass department  with arms like a Nanna. 

I was training with Pom Tutt of Finish Strong UK today doing a shoulder press, when he stops me and says “look in the mirror so you can see what you are doing wrongly and correct yourself”.  Oh the horror, at the very sobering moment it occurred to me how little I look at all of me in a mirror.  I look at my face which isn’t too bad. but the rest of me … well lets face it the rest of me hardly fits in a standard full length mirror unless I stand veeeeerrrrrry far away.

So there I am stood in front of a whole wall of mirror and I can see what I have done to myself in all is glory. Now let me just clear something up here, what I look like does not define me,  however what is does do is hinder me It stops me doing anything that may draw attention to myself , unless I know 100% I can do the task without failing.

Fat shaming is a real thing, the same as skinny shaming, what these individuals don’t realise(or don’t care) is how words effect people. It stops you wanting to dance or run or play a physical game , mainly because you not only have to combat the fitness side of things but also the barrage of comments barked at you from people who think they are funny.  Well News flash wise guy !!! you want funny fat jokes I can blow you out the water … and then you can choose which of the 600 square inches of my ass you can kiss.

So this brings me to Mountains.  

Recently my coach Pom scaled Kilimanjaro , really quite emotionally he talks about how it changed his perspective on life, his work , and his team he coaches.  This was a personal triumph for him and one I can only imagine.

He revealed today he was hesitant to contact me as he wasn’t sure if I would be properly “on board” with the program he wanted to put me on. He was probably right to be hesitant as like I have said I have failed before. 

I am glad he did drop me that message, as in sending me that message he packed my virtual rucksack ready to climb that mountain.  My mountain isn’t 16,001 ft from base to summit, my mountain is in my head, its a volcano of voices picking away at my weaknesses making me have to stop at the door of the gym and take a breath before I walk in.

Pom’s guidance so far (and we are talking three weeks from “the interview”) has given me the strength to move around the gym like I have a right to be there to talk to people in the gym I wouldn’t normally talk to (because they looked to at home and fit not because I was judging them) and to focus on me.

I still don’t like what I see in the mirror and I still have Nanna arms but I am looking up to the summit of that mountain, taking a deep breath and walking on through.